He’d arrived that same day. The ship he had came off was crowded, with others like him and many of different color. Although he was of the same descent, he looked different than even his own kind, rejected in a way. He wasn’t too sure about his new station, and hoped it would be different. It was a new place with new dreams. Would he be chosen for greatness?
She started at a good pace, occasionally stopping to take in her surroundings, sometimes even taking samples. She seemed to be on a specific mission- she would pick things up and examine them closely, only to put them right back or to grab even more samples. She neared the area where he was standing, clueless that she was so proximal to her destiny.
He was in a room with all of his comrades, this room much different than any other he’d ever seen. There were people all around, curious they seemed. It had been a long time since he had seen a people like this. Feeling uncomfortable about his obvious inability to measure up to the guys next to him, he tried to shift to make himself more attractive to those who happened to glance his way. Several people had come by and tried to interact with him, only to look away quickly or to have their face go sour at the sight of him.
It was at that moment she saw him. She’d sworn to never deal with his kind. She’d been around those similar, and didn’t like her dealings with them. But how could she resist? He wasn’t the best looking in the bunch, no, but there was a sort of magnetism about him that demanded her interest.
In came Enemy, under the cover of “just doing his job.” He watched as Enemy swept in like a hawk, giving a fatal blow to another guy only a few rows down. Enemy’s hand neared, and fear swept over him like a rushing wind. No, not today. I will be chosen for greatness- I will not end my days like this!
She saw Enemy trying to destroy her love. “NO! STOP!” she cried. Not today, Enemy can not destroy this love that can so easily produce these deep feelings in her. Reaching out her hand, she barely stopped Enemy from coming in with the deadly kill. Looking right at him, she teared up at the thought of losing her love.
Enemy backed off. She gladly reached for that perfectly-sized, rough-in-appearance, deep-green avocado that had caught her eye from across the produce section.
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Author's Note: This story is loosely based on The Girl and the Thief from the book Twenty-Two Goblins translated by Arthur W. Ryder and illustrated by Perham W. Nahl in 1917. Granted, the original story wasn't about a woman who laid eyes on a perfect avocado, but the basics are the same.
The original story talks about a girl who swears she will never marry. At that time, a thief came and plundered the city, taking everything and killing many. The thief was finally caught and was being dragged to slaughter whenever the girl saw him for the first time. She immediately fell in love with him, and swore that if they didn't let him go she would kill herself rather than live lovesick. He ends up dying and she was going to burn herself on the funeral pyre with him when the favor of the gods allowed him to live. They lived happily ever after. In my version, the thief is the avocado (unloved by those around him) and the girl is the woman who spots the avocado. The Enemy in my story represents a grocer who is just doing his job in removing the produce that doesn't look appealing to customers! I thought this was a fun, creative way to rewrite this already-fun story!
There he was, the perfect avocado that caught her eye from across the store.
Image credit: Wikimedia Commons
Hey, Avery! You have such a unique and impressive storytelling style. I like how in the beginning, I was pulled in because I didn’t quite understand what was happening and that got me to read on since I wanted to know and understand what was happening. It definitely grabbed my attention and it was such a curious tale. Then, when I realized what the story was about, it was such a unique perspective and I was very impressed by how you were able to write from this perspective. I love how you re-wrote it in such a fun and creative way, and your author’s note definitely helped clear up any uncertainties while also providing some background on the original story. The picture was also nice and added a good visual image. I like how you put it at the end so that there’s still the element of mystery while also providing a good visual image when reviewing the story.
ReplyDeleteHi, Avery! Yet another great story in the books for you. I had no idea where you were going with this story and LOVED how it ended. An avocado? Genius. I also did this unit this week and really like how you changed up the original tale. To be honest, I like your version quite a bit more. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteAwesome storytelling! I read twenty two goblins as well this week! It was really cool getting to see someone else interpret the story. Then reading your creative version of how to retell the story was great! I love the avocado ending! Really unique and cute. I think you did a great job of writing to set the end up as a real shock. Good job!
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